How A Running Group Reignited My Passion For Running
Passions do not wane overnight but can be reignited in an instant
A few years ago, I was obsessed with running. I was training to run ultra marathons, I attempted to run a 100-mile ultra marathon and my passion for running couldn’t have been any stronger.
After my attempted 100-mile ultra marathon, my passion for running started to wane. I wasn’t as consistent as I wanted to be and running felt like a chore. My Garmin watch stats showed I was going on 2–3 runs per week which was less than desired.
This decline in passion didn’t happen overnight. It happened over about a year. I was running enough just to stay in running shape but not enough to progress.
Stagnation can be the killer of passion.
As spring rolled around, I committed myself to join a running group this year and go consistently.
On a brisk Chicago evening in March, I went to a local running group that met up at a bar after their runs. It was a small group with about 6–8 runners. For some reason, I didn’t feel like things clicked with the group and I felt discouraged. The people in the group were nice but sometimes you know when you meet people you would enjoy being friends with.
Similar to a mediocre date, I decided that I wasn’t going to go back to that group. It didn’t feel like something I would look forward to going to each week.
I wasn’t going to allow my mediocre experience to stop me though. I searched online for more running groups and found that my local Fleet Feet had a running group every Monday at 6 pm and it worked for my schedule.
Sometimes It Takes More Than One Attempt
Initially, I had hesitation in going. None of the reasons were rational. My excuses were in line with things like this:
What if it’s like the other group?
What if people think I’m weird?
What if I think they’re weird?
What if I can’t keep pace with someone or feel the need to keep pace with someone?
I realized that all these insecurities were my ego trying to protect itself and keep me feeling comfortable. It was time for me to step outside of my comfort zone and do something new.
I ran to Fleet Feet which was about a mile away from my apartment. When I met up with the group, I could immediately tell who were the seasoned group members and who were the new ones.
Sometimes, I feel awkward going in to talk to people who looked like they were seasoned group members because of a fear of being the person who ruins their running group. I looked out for people who looked newer to the group and began to talk to them.
I talked to a guy at the group whose name I cannot remember because I have not seen him at the group since that first run. I had an enjoyable conversation with him, we talked about what races we were training for, and for some reason, I said, “Nothing.”
Nothing?
Why did I say nothing? I have a goal of training for a 100-mile ultra marathon. That’s not nothing.
It unveiled an insecurity to me about myself. I don’t look like a runner much less an ultra marathon runner. My height is 5’10” and I weigh 195 pounds with a body type that looks more like a football player than a runner.
That insecurity of not fitting the part came out at that moment. I didn’t want to share my goal of running a 100-mile ultra-marathon because I felt like it wouldn’t be believable.
As I reflected on this after that first run, I realized that I should have shared my goals with my fellow runners. I made it a point that the next time that it comes up in conversation, I’ll talk about it. No one in the group cares about me as much as I think they do. It’s both a liberating and diminishing feeling at the same time. It’s freeing to realize that you’re not as important as you think you are.
After going back to the running group the next week, I started to get to know people in the group. I became a familiar face and they invited me for drinks at the local bar after the run. This is the part of the running group that makes it fun.
There is a realization to me that socializing is one of the main purposes of a running group. If I showed up, put my head down, and went home, I might as well train on my own. Building connections with others makes you feel as if your purpose is much greater. You don’t have to achieve your goals by yourself. Even though you are ultimately responsible for your goals, it’s a great thing to have people support you along the way.
Obligation Turned Into Motivation
After running with the group for a few weeks, a strange thing started to happen. I started to feel obligated to go.
This was what I was afraid of when I joined a running group. I like to be free and do what I want and I was afraid as soon as it started to feel like an obligation.
I realized that this is good. The running group was holding me accountable for my weekly run. On a conscious level, I know that no one in the group would care if I missed a week but on a subconscious level, I felt like I would be letting everyone down if I didn’t show up.
Sometimes the subconscious is more powerful than the conscious. A feeling can drive you more than a thought. The feeling of an obligation turned into motivation and I kept going. Some of our runs were in 90-degree heat, in the rain, or whatever mother nature through at us. It didn’t matter because we were doing it together.
I have made every group run this year other than the days I was out of town. It no longer feels like an obligation. It’s motivating to go to the group, enjoy a run together, and sit back and drink a few beers afterward.
A Fixed Social Hour
I never realized that I needed to take more time out of my week to socialize. As an introverted person, sometimes I feel like I do not need to meet new people. I'll be okay if I can run, read and write. I was wrong about that part of myself. Even as an introvert, there is some level of socializing and meeting new people that can be energizing. It’s the rush of getting out of your comfort zone that makes you feel as if you are daring to live life.
Having a weekly running group makes sure that I have some social interaction blocked on my calendar each week. There are familiar faces and new faces that appear. Many times, you’ll spend time with the people you’re comfortable talking to but now and then you’ll make a new friend.
It’s important to me to have new experiences consistently. Our perception of time does appear to slow down as we have more novel and memorable experiences. When we sit in the same traffic day after day and work on the same tasks, life seems to speed up. This is why during frightening events, time seems to slow down for us.
Having a weekly run group breaks the week's typical cadence, which is a good thing. Each week and conversation with the people I have after the run is memorable and will be a time that I will cherish.
If you’re hesitant about joining a running group, go out there and do it if your schedule allows. Most of the time, everyone there will welcome you with open arms especially when your face becomes familiar to all of them.
If I didn’t join a running group, I believe I would still be stuck in my rut of running a few times a week and maybe my passion would have been lost.
Has your passion been waning? Life can occasionally feel like it’s getting away from you. That is why I started Setup Sunday at Running Relentless. Sunday is often the perfect day of the week to prepare yourself for the week ahead. If you want tips each week to look at how to set yourself up for a better future, start here and grow each week.